Monday, January 17, 2022
Sunday, May 02, 2021
The middle child
I'd like to have nothing to do
one of these years when Spring arrives.
We are always so busy un-Wintering ourselves and preparing for Summer.
It sucks, Spring.
What always happens to you sucks.
The most in-between of the seasons - somehow you seem to get taken for granted. All your effort, and we run around with our buzzing mowers and our dripping brushes.
We trample the tender shoots, we miss the sleight-of-hand adjustment to the angle of sunlight.
I promise this to you and to me - one of these years I will have nothing to do but enjoy your arrival.
Saturday, April 10, 2021
Occasionally I write down dreams....
(From April 1, 2018 - copied 'verbatim' from a pencil entry on a page in a notebook.)
Had a long dream last night
John Cooke had a bar/restaurant - I was having a meal at the bar with my friend Mike McGettigan - meal, appetizer, bottle of wine - the appetizer was something like a little blowfish flambé - looked more like a 'Mrs. Paul's fishstick' to start but the bartender put a little lighter fluid on it and lit it, it puffed up to look like a blowfish - spitting + spluttering - I told someone at the bar that it wasn't like torturing - it was already dead.
I asked for the bill and went out to the parking lot to get my wallet -my vehicle was a large black steam locomotive - went back inside. John was working on my bill - he said "you had a view-and-chew, right?"
The 'view-and-chew' was a clam or oyster appetizer - I said yes - the bill came to $820. I was kind of stunned, figured I'd have to use a credit card.
I asked if it was a really expensive bottle of wine.
...and somewhere over the last few years I've had this habit of saying "Thank you for letting me tell you that".
Sunday, March 07, 2021
How many years...
At least that's how it starts for me - I'm essentially more of a word person than a music person.
Friday, December 18, 2020
Scrolling through old posts in my 'offline journal' I came across this.
One more attempt to sort-or-understand it all.
2/11/12
There was a magazine next to the crapper, of course.
So
Sometimes after wine, maybe a little too much wine
you will read something. And what had previously escaped your
razor sharp intellect®
is now blazingly, blindingly clear.
The former Poet Laureate whose book on poetry
you’ve labored over
has a poem published in a magazine (which you have fortunately stored next to the crapper)
and every word - instead of being rectangular and indigestible
now actually describes an individual leaf on this
tree
of life.
The poem - it’s about mules and old sayings and getting kicked and breathing. Indeed, what else is there?
This too-much-wine evening also happens to be
the same day as your visit to a church
for a funeral of the mother of a friend.
This church - as it happens - is the same church which for at least a decade in your life was the only reason that you tied shoes onto your feet on one morning each week from mid-June to the end of August.
This church from your past, this moment in your present,
your questions about the hereafter
all condensing, crystalizing right here in this too-much-wine evening.
So today I tied presentable shoes to my feet, tied a tie around the collar of
a presentable shirt and went to the old church and listened to the priest speak.
It’s a moment.
There in the church - the flood of thoughts - how many funerals in this country each day? How many people utter words meant to sum something up?
This - today - is about the moment when whatever it is
that the universe has - or is - separates itself (it would seem) from
a speck - a prism - that focussed the energy of the universe into an identifiable form for eighty-odd years.
So
All of these beams align today - shoes, energy, wine, poetry - and I feel as though I flail and flop like a throw rug in the dryer.
A throw rug walked on by saints and soaked in spilled wine.
Religion. Who’s yer daddy? Jesus? Buddha? Mo-freakin’-hammed?
Raised with Latin phrases
echoing through my brain,
today I realized that what we all want - no matter whose picture is hanging on the wall -
is just something that we can all put our hands on at the same time
and look each other in the eye
and say, “Yes - this is something we agree on”.
The darkness is so vast . . . .
Sunday, May 03, 2020
To focus.
Sunday, February 24, 2019
Sunday, August 14, 2016
Songwriting on the brain...
Tuesday, August 09, 2016
Who shot the blog?
I haven't posted anything to this blog in more than two years - almost three, actually. That in itself is maybe due to how things seem to speed up as we get older. Summer seems to last maybe a month-and-a-half - that kind of thing. But the ease of posting/sharing/revealing in the Facebook era has also been a factor, I believe. In order to include any hypertext or links I'll have to go back to some old posts where I can view the codes used. Do we necessarily have to regret the changing of our tools and methods? I certainly cuss with impatience when I've got to use a manual screwdriver these days (usually when I'm too lazy to go out to the truck to get the powered version). Easier is better?
Cape May Songwriting Workshop - Sept. 13-16 2016
Friday, February 01, 2013
Sunday, December 16, 2012
Went up to Vineland last night to hear Shawn Colvin at the Landis Theatre.
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Learning
So - I guess I was wondering whether performing songs would help me with songwriting. I think it has. There is a component to the good song - singability. I was just listening to a few songs on the International Songwriting Competition website. There was at least one that I started humming along with about halfway through. The songs were on a page of past winners in the various categories - I was listening to the 'folk' and 'singer-songwriter' categories, of course, though I also listened to a jazz vocal composition from a woman in Ireland.
I've been 'playing out' a lot this year - usually two to three nights a week at the Pilot House and I've also been hosting an Open Mic at The Mad Batter on Sunday nights. Playing more often has improved my guitar playing and given me opportunities to try different approaches to phrasing with my songs.
One thing that I'm not sure I know how to do yet is 'work' on songs. I keep my notebooks with me almost all the time and write things down in them just about every day. It seems that I'm usually waiting for some idea to reach a critical mass where it sort of finishes itself - the results are . . . mixed.
I've got a few tunes that I guess I consider finished, but they feel to me as though I was forcing them to conclusions just to have something finished. That's accurate, because I pushed some of them along in the time between being accepted to perform at Singer-Songwriter Cape May and the date of the actual performances. Just a side note here - I'm remembering that my friend George Mesterhazy was there at the real 'first' performance at the Pilot House - it put me much more at ease to have him sitting at a front table. His comments afterward were so encouraging.
I should also say that I've got a few that I consider finished and pretty good. I get good reactions to 'Driver Has No Money' and 'Country Song'. I've been asked who did the 'original version' of Driver and several people have asked me if it was available on CD. A guy who was an editor at Time Magazine and currently writes a blog for Huffington Post complimented a performance of 'Country Song' and offered to forward it to a producer friend in Nashville. At this point I want just one quiet morning or evening to record basic versions of the better songs for official copyright submission.
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Essential equipment.
The first thought in my mind was 'oh, no - guitar fingers!' . . .
Carbide-tipped saw blades can deal with much harder materials than flesh and bone - the blade didn't hesitate for a second to alter what I offered it. My injury could have been much worse - looking at the blade path tells me that another 3/8" would have meant that I was carrying the fingertip with me to the ER. As it was, the Doctor put about 12 stitches from the front, over the tip and down the other side to pull it back together. Well numbed, I didn't feel it when he put the stitches right through the fingernail. Funny to look at it now and see those little holes in the nail.
The stitches were taken out 12 days later - the healing process is going well. Somehow my body is pretty good about healing, especially my hands. I had done something similar - worse, actually - about 26 years before when working on another table saw. That accident shredded the tips of the middle and ring fingers on the left hand and they ended up about 1/4" shorter than they had been.
(I started a song a while back about the abuse suffered by the left hand of a right-handed carpenter)
Back then I was more actively pursuing the side career of pottery - it was my major in college and I had made various attempts to make a living by it. I think that working clay with the fingers as they healed had a positive effect on the whole process. It seemed to me that connecting the mind with the fingers in order to create something made the healing a more organic process - a less passive process. Actually, I've never tried to put it into words and so I'm finding it a bit awkward to describe what I thought I was doing . . .
I thought of that today as I went out to an old plastic tub behind the barn and dug out a small fistful of stoneware clay. It is a tub of scrap clay that has been sitting there with the lid blown off, just weathering for twenty years or more. The kind of clay you'd kill for if you were making some pots - it'll be really plastic from sitting so long. I've been thinking for the last few weeks that I should make clay-working part of the healing process for this injury, too. Shape and flesh-wise, the finger looks like it will be fine for guitar playing. The sensation in it is a mess right now - a weird combination of numbness and over-sensitivity. I know I've got six months until the fingernail is back to normal, but just watching the body go through the healing process is pretty amazing.
I was thinking recently, they say Eskimos have a hundred different words for snow - I should have two hundred words for luck.
Friday, March 02, 2012
Worthless Man
3/02/12 Early, like 1:37 AM
Been working on Worthless Man - trying to make it not suck. It is a ponderous downer of a song, so it seems the latest thing that I’m trying with it is to do it way uptempo. I’m liking this so far, but I’ve been liking what I did to it until I didn’t like it anymore. The chord changes are falling together in a way that I’m happier with. Two verses, a bridge, an instrumental verse (c’mon, Tom Naglee!) and two last verses. Liking the shape of it for now, hoping to do it tomorrow at PHOMN.
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Sometimes a lifetime just ain't enough

To get right to the point, I write very regularly in a songwriting notebook.
This week, on Monday, I got the news of the death of a friend by his own hand. So - this week there are six pages of scribbles and revisions on the subject of his passing . . .
I didn't ask what method he chose
It wasn't important for me to know
I only know that gone is gone
I only know that gone is gone
He's the one staying here
We're the ones moving on
Everywhere I looked this week I saw trucks pulled up side by side
They were talking through the open windows
Talking about the one who died
They found out on Sunday
The carpenter's day of rest
Found him lying on a bed
With a pistol on his chest
I didn't know what method he chose
It wasn't important for me to know
I only know that gone is gone
I only know that gone is gone
He's the one staying here
We're the ones moving on
This Thursday won't be a workday
You'll leave the Carhartt's on the floor
You'll put on a jacket and tie
And head on out the door
Stand around down at Spilker's
Til you just can't stand any more
Trying to get it right, well that can take a lifetime
And sometimes a lifetime just ain't enough
It's not the bad weather, the short money or the sore muscles
It's the being alone that can be so . . . tough.
I didn't know what method he chose
If it left a hole, well it didn't show
I only know that gone is gone
I only know that gone is gone
He's the one in the box
We're the ones looking on
I only know that gone is gone
I only know that gone is gone
He's the one staying here
We're the ones moving on
.
Sunday, January 15, 2012
So, how's that 'songwriting' thing going?
11/04/10
Hooted last night at The Merion with Deb, Mike Kearns, Glenn, Barry T, Barry and Elaine, George and Vickie. Seriously enjoyed myself despite throwing numerous clams. I sang "Killing the Blues" earnestly and artlessly. That's my net assessment as of early this morning. I'm finding out more about what it takes to perform music. Whether or not I ultimately think of myself as a performer, it is still important for me to learn this.
I've hung with Gordon a little and talked to Geo M about recording - told both Gordon and George that my current goal is to be able to produce a demo of three or four songs this year in time to submit it for application to SSCM '11.
My current assessment of my strengths/weaknesses is as follows: I have a nice, if not particularly interesting, voice. My guitar playing skills are fair within a rather narrow comfort range. My knowledge of music is scant, but I'm working on that (in a slacker manner).
I think that my most exploitable skill lies in lyric writing. There seems to be a part of my brain that runs all day long on a kind of side rail, simultaneously with the 'getting-work-done' part of the brain. I've been writing more things down in the past year with the explicit intention that they might be song lyrics. In other words, some degree of rhyming, a few themes, an effort to make these little things arc over a few minutes and make some kind of point - a profound point would be great, any old kind of point is acceptable and of course preferable to pointlessness. Okay?
Soooo . . . I've kept at it, actually finished a few songs last year. I decided not to apply for SSCM in 2011 - a couple of songwriters that I knew were applying and I felt (rightly) that I was nowhere near ready. They had plenty of material, and they had been working at the craft for years. I felt that somehow it would be disrespectful to elbow my way into that scene. That, and the fact that I need a deadline to make me get things done. I guess I never really resolved to get the material together in time.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
9/11/11
There’s coverage of the memorial services on the radio and television this morning. I listened to a little of it - the clock radio was on when I woke up.
Just now I was out in my front yard mowing the lawn. A fire truck from the next town drove by - the firemen were wearing their dress uniforms, not their helmets and coats. A minute later another truck drove by and I thought, “Oh, of course - a memorial service.”
I went back to mowing and something across the road caught my eye. I thought it was a trash bag blown along by traffic - then I saw a uniformed fireman walking along the road and I realized that the object had fallen off the truck. When he picked it up I saw that it was a fireman’s helmet. I stood by the lawn mower and watched as the fireman walked back to the truck that had pulled over just a little way down the road. I didn’t know him, but I realized he looked familiar. I’d probably seen him in the supermarket or the convenience store.
I watched him walk by, waiting for him to look across the road. I knew what I wanted to do - he was past the house and a little ways further down the road when he looked behind him and across the road. When he looked at me I saluted him - he nodded in response. I went back to cutting the lawn and thinking about those hundreds of people who ran into those buildings ten years ago to do their jobs.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Max, the neighbor's dog
Monday, May 24, 2010
Working on Songs












